IRS

I think that stands for Inertial Referencing Systems (if translated correctly). A little work I had to do for Physics, it basically is a work made by Newton (it was started by Galielo though) that says that a system will go by it own speeds/weight despite other system, if I understood correctly. Let's say, if we jumped, and these rules didn't exist, we would jump to our deaths due to the movement of the Earth, that's why we can move freely while a car is moving.

Today was okay, Chemistry was boring, I learned a new way of knowing an element atomic number, using a method based on "Auf Bau" and a work made by the previous principal of my school (RIP)! He actually proposed a new method for getting the cuantic numbers. Which is impressing, because I used his method in CECyTEM.

I signed into the Organic Chem lab with the same teacher as last semester, which is really great because I loved that teacher.

I came back at home and returned to the school around 3PM for Algebra, again, another boring class, we talked about numbers, series and such. Pretty easy if you ask me. Raquel told me that I didn't deserve to be there, so Aide and Lilian...but oh well. My friends Erika (Raquel's sister) and Jazmín are with me in Algebra, Lilian, Aide, Raquel, Carlos and Abraham passed it last semester.

What a lovely rainy day! <3

Deal With It!

You know, first day of school was pretty great! Let me tell you why:

First I had Statistics, my professor is a 50+ year old man, pretty kind and funny, I think his name is José. He passed the two ours presenting himself and talking about his life. He also asked us to tell him our name. It seems like I'll see the same thing thing I saw a CECyTEM, I must play it safe with him, I can easily get a 10 if I don't distract.

Then came Physics, my professor is named Manuel (or Juan or both) Torres, again, another kind and funny person, he talked about himself as well, he seems a little bit cocky, but I can deal with that. He passed a good amount of time talking how smart he is and superior to other professors, he did 3 or 4  questions related to Physics to the whole group, I answered 2. He also left us some homework, we need to research more about 3 of the four questions he did. Again, I've seen some things of the subjects we'll see in CECyTEM, however, I didn't do that well in Physics back then, so we'll see.

Then came Thermodynamics,  this is one of the subjects that scare me the most of this semester. My teacher is named Leticia (?) Zúñiga, she is really kind and funny. Though, she did 4-5 jokes about orgies in one hour....I know. She told us that since her class is the last of Mondays, she'll start the class at 12:15 instead of 12:00... pretty neat. Some friends of Erika (friend from the classroom) said that she is a very good teacher, I hope so.

Circumstances

Tomorrow I start with second semester, I need to do much better this time, I already saw I'm capable of so many things, so this one should be one of those many things.

I'm currently planning to return to the gym; last semester I found myself with so many free time, plus, when I went to the gym while I was at CECyTEM, I noticed I did more schoolwork. So I'll see if I can handle school and gym, that's why this first week I'll see how tough I feel this semester......If I wouldn't need to take Algebra I wouldn't even doubt about it...*sigh*

Also, I'm still considering if I should return, I mean, despite how much I want to return, this time I would need to pay it, and I only have enough money for two months, and well, since my parents ain't giving me a dime since the start of the vacations, I guess I'll have less money. :/

But well, that isn't everything, I still have a family and a school, so I better focus on what I already have.

But well, at least I had an awesome weekend before the start of the semester with Alan and his cousins.

Hope

Seems like I had this one since November.

------

You used to talk to me about the day we could all live as one, the day we could all think as one, the day in which our desires would benefit all of us. Now I look at you and I don't know what had dappen to you, maybe I'll never know who is guilty here, who is behind all this, but I look at you and can't resist to ask you, have you reach what you wanted to? Is this what we wanted? Having to answer for you hurts as equal as the reality.

Hope is something that departed from this place long ago. You used to be the one that gave me hope and made me believe, but please just don't turn back and tell me that you don't know what had happen here because you know that the answers lies deep inside you.

It hurts to know what is going on, but it hurts even more to see your hipocrecy, almost as much as seeing you just sit there and do nothing to change what happens.

My hazy mind can't come with anything else that the same question, what had happens to us?

It doesn't matter how much you try to make me feel better, you'll keep ruining everything with your empty words...

El Necio

Una pluma que cae del cielo.
Rendida ante el desprecio.
Busca el inocente sueño.
Despierta, que el mundo sigue.

Heridas hechas por piedad.
¿Heridas hechas por error?
Dolor que inmuta mi ser.
¿Dolor que arriva por temor?

Aterriza donde más te acomoda.
Permanece aquí hasta sanar.
Toma mi suspiro y hazlo callar.
Que tal vez mi viaje está por terminar.

Invencible Soy

Today I registered my subjects for second semester, I hope I don't mess this time around (I really doubt it). I'll take this semester:
-Algebra
-Thermodynamics
-Physics
-Statistics
-Chemistry II
-Organic Chemistry II
-Experimental Sciences Lab II

It sounds and looks tough, but I won't let that bring me down.

Since I got all my subjects in the morning, I was considering going to register to the gym again, but I decided yo wait a little bit more, I'll take first week of classes to see if I can handle it.

I've been feeling really weird lately, really, as if everyone is trying to "one-up" me, thing I really hate. And not because I can't deal with it, but it's sad to see people needs to do that. I sadly used to be like that, until few months back, but I'm still trying.

You know, I wrote down some words that I wish I could show everyone, but I just won't feel comfortable with posting them. Specially because they show how I failed with one of my dreams.

By the way guys, have I mentioned you I like to sing? Yeah, maybe my voice sucks, but still. *sigh* I wish I could be good for one thing at least. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I'm not good for anything,  it is just I'm good at some things, but I wish I could be really really good for something, something people would know about me because of how good I am at it.

Anyways, it's time to try to sleep again.

Tiempo Suficiente

Severo y preciso, casi inadvertido.

Duro y enigmático, ataca a cualquiera.

Grande y veloz, pasa en un parpadeo.

Finito o infinito, sin compasión.

Te muestras aunque no te pueda ver.

Me demuestras cómo fallé.

Me atacas con tu grandeza.

Ven y corroe, ven y consume.

De mi tristeza te has privado.

Mis pensamientos has modificado.

Mis sueños has destrozado.

Mis emociones has controlado.

The Fall [3] - Answers

Third year was here, now we had the next subjects: Physics, Chemistry, Ethics, Mexican History, English III, Technical Drawing, Sports III and another I can't remember (Arts I think.).

Cesar, Edgar and I kept developing a closer friendship, I did pretty much the same regarding my grades, Chemistry and English kept saving me, my drawing teacher still hated me and now, my physics teacher too! I swear, there was one bimester when Cesar admitted I did better than him and I got a 6 and he got a 10, the teacher didn't justify that grade.

You know, I knew my grades were really, really bad, and that I dissapointed more that one person, I was really doubting if I was going to be able to go to High School, I still remember I prayed a lot asking "for a chance", I remember I said this a lot: "I just want a chance, to prove I'm not a loser, to show of what I'm capable of". Everyday, I said the same "I just want one more chance".

That year we had to pick our high school, we then made a test, and depending of the grades you were assigned to each school. I asked for CECyTEM Izcalli: Tech. Chemistry Laboratorist, since I was 100% sure I wanted to spend my live with chemistry, Cesar and Edgar choose High School #9, one of UNAM's high schools, and apparently one of the best public high school's in Mexico, my dad studied there, and he wanted to make me apply for it, but I decided not to, though, that meant that I was going to take different roads that my two great friends. But well, as long as we got what we wanted, we were okay. I did okay in the test, I was assigned to CECyTEM Izcalli, pretty nice stuff.

That year I also made friends with Andrea (she was deeply in love with Cesar :p), Lucia, Tania (she also was in love with Cesar D: ), Brenda and...Guadalupe? Oh, and there was this guy called Marco, we really didn't like him, but he thought we did, so he never was apart from us.

When I was about to end the course, my Algebra professor (the same I had on second grade), told me that he and I knew that I had a lot of potential, but that I loved to slack a lot, and told me to stop being like that, since that would ruin my life. I still keep his words with me, it was nice that a professor believed in me. I wish I could show him how far I've reached and how much I have left...

That year really shaped my live, I started to be more relaxed about everything, started to be more open to people and such...few days after I ended junior high school I came to this conclusion, people may not like it, but at least it fitted in most cases, and not even just me, more people have agreed with me:

"Bullying may be a bad thing, but seriously, it stops making you act like a girl, period."

Now, don't get me wrong, I know bullying is quite some serious in some regions, but well, here is quite "light", so I think I can say this, but well, that's the way I saw it.

I can say I was quite ready for the next step...

The Fall [2]

Then, it came second year of junior high school, since my parents could not afford a private school anymore, this time I went to a public school, it's name was Moises Saenz.

I wasn't fan of the idea, but there was no other choice.

First day was really odd, I entered the school around 7AM, everyone was in the schoolyard, and I had no idea of where to go, I just new my my group was 2-C, so I kept walking until I found any signs of my group, I think that some minutes after the principal asked for everyone to line up with their respective group. So, I decided to ask a teacher I saw and she took me with the group. There started the disaster.

I will try to be brief with the stories from junior high school, since I pretty much hate that period, and nothing extraordinary happened there.

In second grade I kept doing pretty bad when it came to grades, the only reason of why my report cards weren't that depressing was because of English and Chemistry.

There, I met probably one of the most awesome persons I've ever met, Cesar and Edgar, they're twins. The two of them were really kind with me, though, they were the "smarty pants" of the class...pretty ironical if you ask me. They were friends with Pablo, Rubén, and Levi. I didn't get well with Pablo that year. And now that I remember, Cesar and Edgar started talking to me because of Rubén, which was a cool guy as well. But I lost contact with him after junior high school, I found him on FB few months back, which was pretty nice since we got to talk again.

The classes I had that year were: Algebra (were I wish I would have payed more attention. :p), History, Biology, Geography, Introduction to Physics & Chemistry, English, Sports and and optional subject, I picked "Technical Drawing".

Call me crazy, but many professors didn't like the fact that I was friends with Cesar and Edgar, they said I was going to distract them, they always tried to make us sit far from each one. The teachers that disliked that the most, were my Drawing and Geography teachers, and even Cesar and Edgar agreed with me on that. I had a lot of problems with those two teachers, the Geography teacher simply hated me, she never let me make my expositions because my flip-charts were rolled instead of folded, she never checked my homework, said I never worked and such. The drawing teacher was at least fair with me. I ended up failing Geography for some reason (yeah), I made the extraordinary test, I got an 9/10.

The math professor had a certain interest on me, he knew I had quite some potential, but since I slacked a lot on his class he kept getting dissapointed.

Since I was the newbie there, I kept getting picked by the others, nothing bad really. I got used to it from before. :p

Thanks God, I ended that nightmare in one piece.

Algebra

Well, my test is tomorrow, let's see how I do. While I don't feel 100% ready, I do want to make the test already.

You know, I've always had problems with Algebra since junior high school, due to bad professors or lack of attention by my part (probably the latter), then, in high school, I had bad professors, that instead of helping just confused everyone even more.

Let's see if tomorrow I'll finally be able to say: "I do know Algebra".

Answers

I mean, I spent so much time looking for answers...but I just couldn't see they I had them all the time, I always had the right words with me, but it was just a matter of looking deeper...hmm...

- - -

As soon as I opened my eyes.
A past that made me ill.
A moment that made me feel.
A  live that got filled.

El sentimiento de una única sensación.
Un futuro que brinda emoción.
Un instante de satisfacción.
Un puesto que ya se encontró.

- - -

Who knows? Maybe that's the answer I was looking for...you know, what I left in the road...though,  I found two other things that I was sure I never had, one is bad, one is good, in fact I can tell you more about the good thing: Maybe, just maybe, I found another answer to one of questions; maybe, just maybe, he wanted me to learn from my mistakes, to see the other side of the coin; maybe, just maybe; I'm not allowed to know it all; maybe, just maybe this aanswer holds all that I wanted.

Though...the other thing... I said things I never expected and now I can't find an answer to them, despite how much I want.

La más grande "inferioridad".

Puede que resalten tu inferioridad.
Pero tu fuiste mejor que la mayoría.
Tu eterno amor fue incondicional.
Los días junto a ti fueron una divinidad.

Puede que te vean como un objeto.
Pero fuiste más que cualquiera de ellos.
Tu envidiable belleza era bendición.
Recordarte me llena de emoción.

Puede que digan que ya no existes.
Pero en mi, por siempre vivirás.
Tu paciencia es mi consolación.
Ve y juega, tu historia no tiene fin.

El niño.

La ira arrasó, pero el corazón dominó.
El pensar hundió, pero la luz salvó.
La oscuridad iluminó, pero el destino se mostró.
La hipocresía dañó, pero el amor revivió.

Los días de aquel niño transcurrían.
Su pasado era apto para impresionar.
Su valor, único y de admirar.
Su determinación inigualable.

Pocos saben lo que sus ojos han presenciado.
El dolor no lo ha ni atrapado.
Pues el sabe lo que está esperando.
El es más de lo que se ha escuchado.

Return

Two roads there are, one chance there is.
Analyze them, see them, think about it.
You never know where it will take you.
Don't look behind, it might take you out.

No matter the effort you did.
It all may resume to this.
Take your time, it must worth it.
Take your chance, make it count.

At the end, I shall see my roots.
The journey will mark the road.
My confidence will show the horizon.
My dreams will be my map.

Acciones

Desolado en éstas tierras destrozadas.
No tengo más que recordar lo que fui.
Acciones que marcaron el rumbo.
Acciones que cesaron el momento.

¿Qué otra cosa pude haber hecho?
Era cazar o ser cazado, el peso dominó.
La voluntad decayó, el sol se apagó.
¿Qué otra cosa pude haber cambiado?

Me limito a ver mis días expirar.
La penumbra comienza a cobijar.
El dolor se incrementa al recordar.
La culpa se minimza al observar...

...pero, ¿Qué otra cosa pude esperar?